“The Right Way” blog cont….Chapter 6
April 1, 2012 § Leave a comment
It seems a long time since I last wrote on this blog, well it is two weeks after all.
Sorry if you have missed the updates, but my normal daily work and home life has had to take preference as things got very busy for a while and spare time was like gold dust. Hopefully though, things are now back on track and I can get straight again.
This week I am going to be looking at chapter six of my book. The wrong approach.
1) Bitterness is a cancer,
2) Love yourself to love others,
3) Forgive yourself to forgive others.
Bitterness is a cancer
Yes! Bitterness is a cancer. When you hold a grudge against someone for whatever reason, it gradually gnaws away inside you. Not necessarily noticeable at first, but believe me it is there doing its nasty little job of work.
In our heads we seem to convince ourselves that we can forgive and forget, but really we want to shout and scream at the person(s) concerned, or worse still do harm to them, or we might carry out some sort of vendetta in our own heads but not actually doing harm to them. Which by the way would then land us in trouble with the police. Maybe even the start of a criminal record.
So we have a cancer growing inside caused by our own attitude towards somebody. Notice that I said caused by our own attitude, not everything can be blamed onto satan. Although we may be in some areas living the way that he wants us to live, we have allowed it to happen. Either way we have it and may have been caused by someone whom we have to work with, is a member of our family or church or association. How are we going to deal with that cancer, the solution is to say sorry, that done we can now carry on as before. Wrong, if we just carry on as before the cancer will eventually return.
So where did this bitterness/cancer come from, it is of our own making.
Because we initially decide that we won’t say anything to the person concerned because we can cope with it, we lock it away. Rather like a block of cheese being put in the fridge because we know the fridge will keep it fresh, but there are changes taking place which we cannot see. Eventually those changes become evident in the form of mould. Ok! I know that we can cut the mould off and still eat some of the cheese, but if we put the cheese back into the fridge and leave it there for a while it will soon develop more mould.
It is rather like that when we have this lack of forgiveness inside us. As already mentioned it begins to gnaw away at us on the inside and the mould i.e. bitterness/cancer begins to form. Eventually the resentment that builds up within us starts to change us as a person, not in all points of our personality but in areas that would cause us to think about the reason for this change.
Love yourself to love others.
Before we can forgive the person(s) who done wrong to us, we must forgive ourselves and learn to love everything about ourselves. For it is not possible to love someone else if you are unable to love yourself. Within the ways of the world this may be seen as narcissism (from Greek Narkissos) where one is too much in love with oneself. In the spirit you have to be love to give love. For we are made in God’s own image and God personifies love. Love is embodied within itself and gets stronger and stronger with love.Without this no man can truly love, therefore without love you cannot give love.
Forgive yourself to forgive others.
Without love you cannot forgive, just as you have to forgive yourself to be able to forgive others. This is so important to be able to give true forgiveness to others that have done wrong to you. Why would anyone want to live life with the turmoil that unforgiveness can cause, living within them. It binds you up, limits your capacity for happiness and much more. Having personally experienced this cancer, I can say with true conviction that being let free through forgiveness and love is a wonderful feeling a true blessing from God. If you have never felt a true weight being lifted and being replaced with an unprecedented love, then you have yet to experience, one touch from the King.
Meanwhile, stay good – you know you should, and if you tried you know you could.